Common Myths And Facts

1. MYTH: It could never happen to me

FACT: All individuals are potential rape victims: regardless of age, race, class, religion, occupation, sexual orientation, educational background, or physical description.  Both males and females can be rape victims. Rape is never the victim's fault.

2. MYTH: Men cannot be sexually assaulted by women.

FACT: Although the majority of sexual assaults of men are committed by men, women do sexually assault men. Sexual assault is not always enacted through overwhelming physical force: it can involve emotional manipulation whereby a man can be coerced into a sexual act out of fear of potential repercussions for his relationships, work, etc. The number of men identifying sexual abuse by a woman as a boy or young man has increased over the past few years. Ideas that men should always want sex with women and that as a young man you should feel lucky if you have sex with an older woman also make it difficult for a man to publicly name sexual assault by a woman.

3. MYTH: Most sexual assaults are committed by strangers. It’s not rape if the people involved know each other.

FACT: Most sexual assaults and rape are committed by someone the victim/survivor knows. A study of sexual victimization of college women showed that about 90% of victims/survivors knew the person who sexually victimized them. Most often, a boyfriend, ex-boyfriend, classmate, friend, acquaintance or co-worker sexually victimized the person. It is important to remember that sexual violence can occur in both heterosexual and same gender relationships.

4. MYTH: Victims/survivors provoke sexual assaults when they dress provocatively or act in a promiscuous manner.

FACT: Rape and sexual violence are crimes of violence and control that stem from a person’s determination to exercise power over another. Neither provocative dress nor promiscuous behaviors are invitations for unwanted sexual activity. Forcing someone to engage in non-consensual sexual activity is sexual assault, regardless of the way that person dresses or acts.

5. MYTH: It’s only rape if the victim/survivor puts up a fight and resists.

FACT: Many states do not require the victim/survivor to resist in order to charge the offender with rape or sexual assault. Those who do not resist may feel if they do so, they will anger their attacker, resulting in more severe injury. Many assault experts say that victims/survivors should trust their instincts and intuition and do what they believe will most likely keep them alive. Not fighting or resisting an attack does not equal consent.

6. MYTH: It is not sexual violence if it happens while/during/or after drinking or taking drugs.

FACT: Being under the influence of alcohol or drugs is not an invitation for sexual activity. A person under the influence does not cause others to assault them; others choose to take advantage of the situation and sexually assault them because they are in a vulnerable position. A person who is incapacitated due to the influence of alcohol or drugs is not able to consent to sexual activity. If someone is intoxicated, they legally cannot consent to sex. Half of sexual assaults involve alcohol consumption by the victim, assailant or both. Consensual sex is something we do with each other, not to each other.

7. MYTH: All sexual violence survivors will report the crime immediately to the police. If they do not report it or delay in reporting it, then they must have changed their minds after it happened, wanted revenge or didn’t want to look like they were sexually active.

FACT: There are many reasons why a sexual violence victim/survivor may not report the assault to the police or campus officials. It is not easy to talk about being sexually assaulted and can feel very shameful. The experience of retelling what happened may cause the person to relive the trauma. Another reason for delaying a report or not making a report is the fear of retaliation by the offender. There is also the fear of being blamed, not being believed and being required to go through judicial proceedings. Just because a victim/survivor does not report the sexual violence does not mean it did not happen.

8. MYTH: Only gay men are sexually assaulted. And it is gay men who sexually assault other men.

FACT: Any man can be raped, whether he identifies as straight, gay, bi, transgender or fluid sexuality. Rape is an act of force or coercion where someone's personal choice is ignored. Just as being robbed does not tell you anything about someone's sexuality, neither does rape. However, research does suggest that gay-identifying men are more likely to be the subject of sexual violence. Most men who sexually assault other men identify themselves as straight.

9. MYTH: Only young, pretty women are assaulted.

FACT: The belief that only young, pretty women are sexually assaulted stems from the myth that sexual violence is based on sex and physical attraction. Sexual violence is a crime of power and control. Offenders often choose people whom they perceive as most vulnerable to attack or whom they believe they can assert power. Men and boys are also sexually assaulted, as well as persons with disabilities and members of our LGBTQ+ community. Assumptions about the “typical” victim/survivor might lead others not to report the assault because they do not fit the stereotypical victim/survivor.

10. MYTH: If a person goes to someone’s room or house or goes to a bar, they assume the risk of sexual assault. If something happens later, they can’t claim that they were raped or sexually assaulted because they should have known not to go to those places.

FACT: This “assumption of risk” wrongfully places the responsibility of the offender’s action with the victim/survivor. Even if a person went voluntarily to someone’s home or room and consented to engage in some sexual activity, it does not serve as blanket consent for all sexual activity. When in doubt if the person is comfortable with an elevated level of sexual activity, stop and ask. When someone says “no” or “stop,” that means “STOP!” Sexual activity forced upon another without valid consent is sexual assault. California requires affirmative consent that is mutual, voluntary, knowing, on-going, and revocable at any time.

• For more myths and facts download the Myths and Facts Flyer
• For statistics visit the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN) Victims of Sexual Violence: Statistics webpage

 

Subject to Change Disclaimer:

The information (including Office procedures and links) on this page is subject to change and updates without prior notice to keep the District in compliance with Board Policies and/or State and Federal laws.